Beginners Mind

This last weekend's seminar with George Ledyard Sensei has left me with a profound feeling of "beginners mind". I now get to rebuild my Aikido. Sincerely, thank you Ledyard Sensei.

For months now training in Saturday morning "Breathing" class, Sensei has been hinting at the power that lies when you choose to let go of conflict. I realize now that I have so much to unlearn. I can't just do it during randori practice at the end of class, I have to start back at the beginning, on everything. Olson Sensei has showed me what's on the other side of the brick wall, a lush garden of Aiki possibility. Ledyard sensei has handed me, and everyone else on the mat this weekend the instruction manual to dismatle that wall.
In, Up and Out.

It will take me a while to figure out exactly why these new techniques work. But when they work, it feels incredibly magical. It's so hard to not think they were flukes, or that uke just bailed for you. The most incredible experience for me by far was on Friday night, after working through breathing and hanmi excercises. Ledyard called on me to uke for katate-dori tenkan.
I was so excited to get to plant a "spine-touching" uke-waza attack on his wrist. I was planted, grounded and felt like I was not going anywhere. And then without feeling any sensation in my wrist or arm, when Ledyard breathed and shifted into me, inexplicably I felt myself go up. Not much, maybe 1/4", and then when he exhaled slightly, I felt like I fell about a foot as he easily turned around me and pinned my feet to the mat. It was one of the most profound uke experience I've had.

After spending the whole weekend practicing the rescipie for this type of fundamental aiki techique, I'm so excited to keep working on it. It's going to be hard for me to not spend my entire time on the mat looking for those perfectly relaxed but extended movements of hip and breath that let us tap into uke's unconscious movements. This is in fact my challenge in the Intermediate Class. How do I teach my "old" aikido, while wanting to learn "new" aikido at the same time. And once I to have a grasp of the true subtle nature of this aiki, how much should/can be taught to those only beginning on their path? It's obviously incredibly important. How do you teach that the unseen and unfelt is more important that the big movements that we've been doing for years?

I don't have the answer, but I'm going to go looking for it.
I hope you'll all come along with me.